A Girl In The Den
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The Music Beer-and-Nachos Is Playing:
{Honky Tonk Badonkadonk} ||-|| { Songs About Me } ||-|| {Trace Adkins}
||-|| Suggestions : ||-|| ||-|| : Comments ||-||

My blog is worth $16,936.20.
How much is your blog worth?

||-- The Coffee Table --||
(The Den's eZine Story Collection)
||-Bedside Reads-||
||-Writings Of RemittanceGirl-||

||-- The Bar --||
||-Politics and Gov't Night-||
||-Poetry Night-||
||-Sexy Tomatoes-||
||-- Beer Nuts --||

||-- Couch Stainers --||
||-Big Dick-||
||-Chick (& Dick [MIA])-||
||-derek s.-||
||-Mike (#1)-||
||-Mr. Smithereen-||

||-- Couch Potatos --||
||-El Sid-||
||-Zeus, Big Dick's Cat-||

||-- The Dark Corner --||
( 18+ )
||-Three Boobs-||

||-- On Beer Run --||
||-Big Fan-||
||-Mike (#2)-||
||-Rattl'n along-||
||-The Furnace-||

||-- JukeBox Review --||

||-Blaine Larsen-||
-How Do You Get That Lonely-

-Lolipop Porn Bitch-

||-Dresden Dolls-||
-Girl Anachronism-
-Miss Me-
-The Perfect Fit-

||-Jeff Bates-||
-My Inlaws Are Outlaws-

||-Kelly Clarkson-||


||-Marilyn Manson-||
-Sweet Dreams-

-Next Contestant-

||-Nine Inch Nails-||

||-Peter Gabriel-||
-Signal To Noise-

||-Toby Keith-||
-Taliban Song-
-Weed With Willie-

||-Tony C & The Truth-||

||-Trace Adkins-||
-(Love Me Like There's) No Tomorrow-
-Honky Tonk Badonkadonk-

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||- Beer-and-Nachos Supports CLICK -||

Dear "Paco",

If you would be kind enough to pay for the plane ticket to her hometown, I will go kick her ass. Until then, FUCK OFF!

For the rest of you, if you would like directions to my "new" blog, email me.

x Beer-and-Nachos

Wednesday, November 23, 2005
It Ain't No Surprise

If you haven't heard by now, let me fill you in:

C and I are back together.

Call me a dumbfuck, I probably deserve it. Especially since this time we are in for the long haul.

We both realized all our fighting was surrounded by a common "we're not getting married, what does it matter?" notion. We smacked into the inevitable brick wall in our relationship. After three hours of discussion, we reached a conclusion: we both want more than what we had, shockingly we want the same thing, and we figured we could work through the issues caused by that one little notion.

I will not lie and say things have been a walk in the park; it's been hell at times, paradise at times. It is quite the roller coaster ride: high and exhilerating and fun one minute, down and hurt and depressed the next.

To be fair, he isn't the only one causing all the insane arguments, though now, like "growedups" we aren't fighting so much as simmering and then discussing. I'm learning to admit I was wrong, he's learning to see from another point of view. So far we've worked all our squabbles out. Except one. The right to privacy in email and phone txts and snailmail letters.

I was talking to a pal and he told me that commited relationships were a ton of work because you had to remember that "me" time becomes "we" time and very seldomly are the two seperated; a single person's individuality becomes lost in the mix. I understand this, but at the same time I'm inclined to argue that some level of individuality must remain for the relationship to work; to me, that is some form of privacy and trust in that privacy.

C knows everything that went on while we were seperated those three weeks. He knows about Halloween, he knows about TJ, he even knows about an unblogged Wednesday night (Bunny, I owe you an apology; I got confused on the days). My vow to him when we had our discussion was to be completely honest with him about everything. So far I have kept true to that.

However, he seems to think being truthful and honest includes allowing him to read my email, browse my phone's txt history, and read through any suspect letters I recieve. There is a definate line being crossed, at least to me. I'm not trying to hide anything, I just don't feel that's right. To me, that's him being either paranoid or controlling or both. He chalks it up to not knowing what I'm up to. My response? I don't know what he does or what he's up to either when he's not at work or school. Do I worry? Yes. Do I care? Yes. Do I get paranoid? To a degree. But do I let it control me to the point of insanity? No, because I trust him.

Maybe I trust too easily. Maybe I trust to blindly. Maybe I trust too much. I lay my faith in him, why is it so hard for him to do the same?

A few weeks ago I refused him access to my email. That ended with bruised tissue and pulled muscles on my part because he physically tried to get to the computer. A week or so before that he held me down so he could skim a letter I'd recieved from an old braniac physics pal who'd moved to Houston. Then a week ago we fought, albeit playfully most of the time, literally for hours, over my phone. It got to the point his mom stepped in and took it and hid it. A result of that was an elbow to my left breast and later a palm to his cheek (both accidental). These injuries could have been avoided, no?

Am I wrong in my thinking? Should all my privacy be dissolved?

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

I filed worker's comp today.

The irony of it all:
The bracer on the door that is supposed to lock in the open position to keep fingers from getting smashed failed to lock and pinched my finger.

Even more irony:
I designed it.

ALTHOUGH! The company who built it for us "modified" the design so they could build it faster; they didn't have the punch that was called out in the drawing.

My supervisor, upon hearing of my injury, called up and cussed out the one who approved the "modifications".

He Cooks?

Day 3 seemed to be it; my appetite came rushing back last night and I suddenly couldn't get enough to eat. And I could keep it in my stomach!

Turns out it was a combination of "The Plague" and PMS. Double whammy. Dick, Jethro, you have NO idea what that's like, and you never will. I want no more complaining from any other men who get sick. Ever. Fucking babies. I even went to work like that. Saturday AND Monday (building is closed Sunday...I was so bored out of my mind I would've gone just to have something to do! Hell, that's the only reason I go to work daily at 6:15!).

And since it is also PMS, I'm bloated so bad I can barely fit into my "fat jeans"--which really makes no sense to me; I've been unable to eat and/or retain food since Saturday. And I'm more touchy about my weight lately, I think it has to do with C and his "lose that...now!" attitude. So Imagine how depressed I am when I look in the mirror and see this ginormic belly and flab refusing my jeans closing--my fat jeans, the baggiest pair I own just for this time of the month.

I think I just got WAY off track of where the train was headed in my mind....

So I got my appetite back last night. I couldn't get enough to eat. I made my way to Taco Bell; it was a gamble, I was starving but was unsure if I would be able to handle it or keep the food longer than the 20-30mins of the previous days. Taco Bell has this burrito...humongous and grilled to perfection...yesh, the Chicken Grilled Stuffed Burrito, the #2 Big Bell Value Meal. When I finished that, I went to Target; needed to exchange a bra I'd bought--I grabbed a cupsize too small. 34Ds don't fit anymore; must be a 34DD. Shocking, I know.

I ended up leaving as soon as I could, nausea kicked in again. To my pleasure, though, I did not throw up. The exertion from the shopping (bought new gloves and new sunglasses and two new thongs while  I was there) was exhausting me and making me nauseous. So home I went.

I have a backlog of things to do since I'm never home. I have a ton of photos to dig through, crop, and edit for a christmas gift and a few for the Buzznet, dA, and Flickr accounts. Is it no wonder I went straight to the computer 'til my stomach settled? C was on and asked me how my day had been and I asked him what he was up to for the evening. His response was "I'm cooking dinner, so we can't do anything tonight. You wanna come over and eat?"

Cooking? What all does he cook? "Hey, as long as you're exeptional at one dish, you don't need to cook anything else"

His dish: Chili

I accused him of trying to kill me; I'm sick with some tummy bug and he's offering me chili.

But you know what? I just can't stand chili; something to do with mom's spicy stuff that turned me off to it--yet C got me begging for more! THAT BOY CAN COOK!

Monday, November 21, 2005
Let's Begin Day 3!

I'm sick. Or pregnant, but I'm going with sick. Today is Day3 of nausea and tiredness and sweating. Why am I sitting here hoping it's the flu? A loooonge drawn out flu? I'm not that much of a masochist! Or am I......?

I've given up on my simple hints (who'm I kidding, I was practically shoving it in his face) and I came right out and asked C what his plans were for Turkey Dinner and asked him to join me at noon-ish for my family's turkey dinner. If that's not hint enough for him to ask me to dinner with him.....I don't know what is! Men are thick-headed idiots.

I'm going to go throw up now...'scuse me.....

Sunday, November 20, 2005
Before I Forget...


Fucked Up

Blogdrive is screwing up my posts.

You should see a purple post from Saturday.

Says I'm sick. I am. Either pre-pms, pregnancy, or the "plague" (perJethro)

And it's 6am and my damn spoiled cat just woke me up because his bladder's about to burst and no one is here to let him outside.....

....I'm going back to the couch (where I sleep when I'm home alone).

Friday, November 18, 2005
I Swear....

I better fucking have what Jethro had....

...'cuz if I don't get better and see certain results in two weeks, I'm fucking castrating C.

(all proclaimed while clutching a stomach that's decided to churn and reject its contents)

Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Ignore Me...

...everyone else is.

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Since I'm being hurried to finish my weekend tale from, what? two weeks ago?, by a blogger, I won't type out my night last night.

No, instead I will refer you to the bloggers I met and enjoyed the evening with.

And tell you that I had my first stripclub experience. Not bad. Though I think I was focusing a tad bit too much on the shoes. Hi, I'm beer-and-nachos, and I am a girl who is in love with high high heeled shoes.

Ok. Yea. And my hair smells, even after a wash, like that cigar...But it's nice. I remember the night and am not hung over this morning (like I'm sure some of you guys are).


(There were two others, Zelda's Carlos and Jethro's Jon...If they have blogs, I don't know them and/or didn't get them)

Oooodles of luck to Jethro on the exams he finished. He was the reason for our meeting; he needed a celebration for the ending of such a week from Hell. (BTW: he's cuter than his picture suggests. His wife is one lucky lady)

Zelda, his lovely wife (and the epitome of dichotomy), who had a crazed first experience Dallas Bus stations. (Wonder if she got to pounce Jeth.....)

Oh! I met BigDick too. Interesting fellow. Much funnier in person, let me tell you! Just don't believe anything he says about me, even though it may be true....

Now, to finish the next section of that weekend tale....

Saturday, November 12, 2005

A screenshot from work -- working on a bill of materials (BOM) for the Main Cover Assembly of our machine....

...He's haunting me!

Yes, I'm that bored. At work. On a Saturday. At 6:45am. I-need-a-life.

Beer-and-Nachos Supports:

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